Emotions

Well, I didn't fast this Fast Sunday - because I could potentially be pregnant, but then this morning I found out that I'm not. :o( I wish I could have known yesterday so I could have been fasting today. *sigh* I told Tyler that my period came right before church began. He asked me if I was going to bear my testimony and I said: "No, I don't want to cry." So, he decided to bear his testimony...and he cried. Poor guy. The whole infertility issue has been so difficult for us both. We always dreamed of having a big family with lots of kids and happy memories like the ones we both had growing up. I'm not saying that I don't appreciate having our daughter and that we don't have happy experiences with her - it's a dream to have her in our lives...we just want some siblings for her. This is a difficult trial.

Now that I'm really focused on trying to lose weight, we thought that perhaps we should take a short break from infertility methods. We went to the temple on friday and Tyler prayed to know if we should continue them or not - before he could even ask the question in prayer the answer came: "YES." So, regardless of what happens, we know that we're supposed to be doing infertility treatments at this time. I'm grateful for answered prayers.

Flank Steak

I'm not much of a steak person, but I discovered this recipe for flank steak and it has changed my views on steak:


Flavorful Flank Steak
Prep Time: 5 MinutesCook Time: 15 Minutes
Ready In: 20 MinutesYields: 6 servings

INGREDIENTS:
1/2 cup soy sauce
1/2 cup vegetable or canola oil
3 tablespoons red wine vinegar or cider
vinegar
3 tablespoons barbecue sauce
3 tablespoons steak sauce
2 tablespoons dried minced onion
1 tablespoon liquid smoke flavoring (optional)
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 (1 1/2-pound) beef flank steak
DIRECTIONS:
1.
In a large resealable plastic bag, combine the first eight ingredients. Add the steak; seal bag and turn to coat. Refrigerate for 8 hours or overnight.

2.
Drain and discard marinade. Grill steak, covered, over medium-hot heat for 6-8 minutes on each side or until meat reaches desired doneness (for medium-rare, a meat thermometer should read 145 degrees F; medium, 160 degrees F; well-done, 170 degrees F) Slice steak across the grain.

Things are going well today. We went to Anna's ballet class - she's doing okay, but having trouble memorizing the different positions. We cleaned around the house and did ALL the laundry (there was quite a MOUND on the couch) and then decided it was time for some wii and dr. mario. Aren't saturdays grand?

3 days down...

This morning I weighed in at 330.0 lbs - that's 5.2 lbs since wednesday! :o) All in all - it's going well, the exercise, the dieting, everything. I'm really excited about it. This afternoon I color analyzed Nicole and it was really fun. She's a winter (surprise, surprise) & I've noticed that I color analyze more winters than any other season. Funny, eh?

This evening we went to the Temple. We were supposed to do initiatories, but Tyler ended up in sealings. I enjoy initiatories the most - and it was wonderful. :o) We came home and had some green juices. We juice romaine lettuce, spinach leaves, green pepper, cucumber, broccoli, & celery. It's VERY tasty and oh, so healthy! :o)

My sister, Rachel, is engaged. Here's a photo of she & Alex, aren't they adorable??

30 years old

Happy Birthday Tyler! My sweet husband is now 30 years old. We celebrated by going out for dinner on Tuesday - since Tyler has class on wednesdays. I allowed for El Toro to do the cooking and it was so delicious! They even sang to Tyler and put whip cream on his nose before letting him eat their complementery fried ice cream! :o) For his birthday, Tyler asked for a Tiger Woods golf wii game. (I'm currently bidding on one via eBay.) I wish I could have made Tyler's birthday more eventful - but he's honestly happier when I don't spend money.

Today is day 2 on the new lifestyle change. It's been going quite well. Tyler wants me to weigh in every day to chart out my success - I think he just wants to be able to graph something. ;o) I began the lifestyle change at 335.2 lbs. This morning I weighed 331.0 lbs! Not bad for one day of exercise/diet. My goal was to lose 5 pounds the first week - I'm almost there! :o) Now I need to determine what some rewards will be for goals that I am going to set, such as: 30 consecutive days on the diet with no cheating, 5 days of exercise in a week, and by the pounds dropped. The most that I've been able to lose is 30 pounds, so I thought that when I lose 30 pounds, I'm going to get a massage. I've never had one done by a professional, but I hear they're amazing. Another reward idea I have is for bath & body works products...any other suggestions of non-food rewards that you would enjoy? I could use some more ideas.

I went to the YMCA this morning. My friend, Nicole, was there with her kids. It was really nice just chatting with her and getting to know her better. I like who I am when I'm around here - she's full of compliments and positive ideas.

Today Maria & I (and the kids) went grocery shopping and then back to my house to make some carne asada, frijoles refritos, & arroz (don't worry, I didn't eat any). I'm excited to find some recipes that I enjoy eating. It was really tasty. I am a warrior.

Who's with me?

I love food. And I don't have self control - therefore, I eat as much of anything that I want to eat. Thus I weigh 330 pounds. I like sugar, flour, & butter - in several varieties. I am beginning to realize that this way of eating is affecting my health and if I don't change it - I could shorten my life &/or have serious health problems, such as diabetes and heart problems. I have decided that I want to change my lifestyle. I will be going to the YMCA 5-6 days a week, following the SBD (south beach diet), juicing vegetables, doing cleanses, fasting, and meeting with a counselor to find out why my eating patterns are the way they are. I'm amazed that people can eat one or two cookies and then STOP - I don't. I wonder if there is some unconscious reason for that. Hopefully the counselor will clue me into this and help me replace this behavior with something healthier than a bag of oreos. Tyler gave me a blessing that I should seek the support of my family and friends to help me through this arduous task. I will begin this plan tomorrow. I am not asking for you all to do what I'm doing - but I would ask your support. This lifestyle will change so much for me, I won't be entertaining people with food - that will have to be replaced with non-food activities (games, etc). I LOVE to entertain people and I LOVE to cook/bake...that will be hard to change, but I feel that this is the time of year to begin. I love holidays, but after Easter - it's a while until July 4th. It's holidays that derail me from my dieting efforts. If there is anyone who is dieting/exercising/trying to be healthy - let me know! I'm here to support you as well. Who's with me?

We need company

It seems as though we need company coming over to our house to give us the motivation to clean it up. Tyler said that it's a good thing that we invite people over to our house - so it can be clean! :o) Thankfully, Maria & her girls came over tonight - so the house is mostly clean!

I hope you all had a great Easter Sunday. Church went wonderfully - we had a lovely Sacrament meeting with phenomenal speakers and beautifully inspiring music. As I walked the halls in our church building today, I realized how very comfortable I feel in this ward. With so many dear friends in this ward, I feel as though I'm home here.

This afternoon we took a nice 2 hour nap and then Tyler & I had a family council to discuss some of Anna's recent behaviors. We realized that we are reading a book on how to raise the perfect puppy for Maggie - but we haven't read any books on how to raise a well adjusted child for Anna. So, for your readers out there - which book(s) would you recommend on how to raise a child? The older that Anna becomes, the more worried I am about whether I am teaching her correctly or not. Any thoughts would be welcome on this topic.

We invited Maria and her 3 daughters over to color Easter eggs, have an Easter egg hunt and to watch the movie Enchanted. It was a lovely evening - here are 2 videos. The first one was on nightshot setting - my couches aren't white! I finally figured it out by the second video...enjoy:

Kirtland

Yesterday we went up to Kirtland, OH and we took Maggie along, as well. It was a bit of a drive there and we spent about 3 hours there. We saw the Kirtland Temple, The Newel K. Whitney store and the visitor's center which had a lovely film about Kirtland. Check the sidebar for pictures. One picture is of Tyler & Coulter in the room above the store where the School of the Prophets took place. I learned that not only did Jesus Christ visit them in that room, but that Heavenly Father did as well. Zebedee Coltrine was present and there is a neat quote about the appearance of Heavenly Father. It was really fascinating!!! Tyler greatly enjoys church history and he's taught me many things about it - this trip really strengthened my testimony about what the pioneers went through and it helped me gain a new perspective about myself, a pioneer in my own right. They were able to build a temple when it was thought impossible - what, then, are we able to accomplish in our lives in this day? Miracles haven't ceased. I look forward to seeing many miracles in my lifetime.

Coulter took off this morning. Anna has been praying that Coulter will live with us forever. We had a wonderful visit with him this past week - although, we're a bit short on our sleep! Today we played catch-up on our house cleaning and laundry and SLEEP! I made some ebelskivers for tomorrow morning. I think they would make an excellent holiday breakfast. :o) March 22nd is my Dad's birthday - happy birthday dad! :o) Happy Easter to you all!

IUI

This morning we had our IUI. I have 2 mature eggs - measuring around 18 and 19, I believe...or maybe 20. They're ready to go! Our sample was 75 million sperms with 35% mobility. In 2 weeks we'll take the pregnancy test. I am hopeful this will be our month. I've been thinking that with as much work as it's taking us to have baby #2, it's highly probable that we won't have more than that, meaning 2 kids total. I always wanted 6 kids and Tyler wanted 10 kids, but it just doesn't seem to be what God wants for us. It's becoming easier to accept this reality as I've become older. In fact, I've grown quite accustomed to having a self-sufficient little girl who can put on her own clothes, take a bath on her own and who can do chores like putting away silverware and taking the laundry out of the dryer. :o)

Happy Easter!

Yes, it's not Easter Sunday, but we had our Easter feast today, complete with Black Forest Ham (from Sam's club - it's the BEST), holiday style mashed potatoes, homemade crescent rolls, corn, sparkling grape juice, and the traditional sunny coconut cake. I posted the recipes on the left sidebar - in case you want some new ideas for your Easter feast! It was SO good...we wanted to have leftovers for the next few days. Coulter leaves on saturday morning and Tyler may be going out of town on Sunday morning (it's still up in the air for now), and we're going to Kirtland, OH, on friday...so why not have the meal on wednesday? Here's some photos:

216

Last night, we all four went bowling on-base, they are having reduced prices on games every tuesday in March - only $1.75 per game and no cost on shoes! We weren't upset about that, let me tell you! Back in college, Tyler used to go bowling 2-3 times every week. The highest score he ever had was 195. His goal was to reach 200, but it eluded him. However, last night - when he was completely out of practice - he bowled a 216. Needless to say, he is quite excited about it. Next time you see him - bring it up, he doesn't mind talking about it. ;o)

Singing all the day long

Choir practice went really well today - they sound wonderful on The Lord's Prayer. I'm excited to hear them perform it next week on Easter Sunday. :o) My friend, Maria, was confirmed today in Sacrament meeting. It's becoming more common for me to cry during ordinances, I've noticed, like when a baby is blessed or a baptism, etc. I am so happy for Maria - and she told me today that she's very happy. I sang Via Dolorosa in Sacrament meeting. I'm becoming more confident in singing songs from memory. I hope that will be the same during my NATS competition in April. :o)

After lunch, we took a nice nap and then I went to stake choir practice. I'm singing a 2 measure solo in He Shall Wipe Away All Tears - a lovely, lovely song, which I've known/sung for a long time. I shouldn't be nervous, but I'm a little intimidated by the choir conductor - he's extremely talented. The more we sang through it, though, I felt more at ease.

Coulter, Tyler, & I played a game of Settlers - which I won. (that's 2 days in a row, I'm on a roll, baby) We should be going to bed - but Maggie's playfulness is very entertaining, plus chatting it up with Coulter....

Get 'er done

This morning we started tidying up the house (after I finished watching all the season 4 episodes on nbc.com of The Office) and prepared for having Cari & her family over. I color analyzed both Cari and her husband, James. It was really fun - they're both autumn seasons! :o) I think it's rare to find couples who are the same seasons, although Glittersmama & her hubby are both winters. After the color analysis, we went over to Cari's house for a potluck dinner with Monica & Chad coming as well. Then Tyler, Anna, & I had to race up to the church for Maria's baptism. It was a lovely service. I was able to stand in the dressing room area and watch Maria be baptized and help her get ready afterwards. It was a special moment to share with her. I felt impressed to tell her that when you feel the Spirit that it can cause you to become emotional and cry. Then, when she bore her testimony after the baptism - she became emotional and cried. I hope my little prep talk made it easier to bear. In the church it's not uncommon for people to become emotional when sharing their testimony - but I can imagine that non-members wouldn't be prepared for it to happen. Anyhow, it was a lovely service and she had a great time. Afterwards, Tyler, Anna, & I went back to Cari's house for some DIRT pudding and a rousing game of Settlers of Catan. (I won, by the way!) Then Tyler had to leave early during the game (which is why I won, I'm sure) to pick up Coulter from the airport. Whew! It's been a BUSY day...but a very rewarding one as well! :o)

Friday night

It's amazing how the weather affects your productivity. This morning I seemed pretty productive, but as the day went on...and the rain continued - I began to be sleepy and had zero desire to do anything except play games with my family and enjoy little Maggie. :o)

Tomorrow my friend, Maria, is going to be baptized. The missionaries asked me to give a talk, in spanish, but after thinking it over they asked me to say the prayer, instead. That was very nice of them - I can speak spanish, or rather I can communicate in spanish, but I don't think I'd do very well in giving a talk on baptism. I'm just sayin'. I'd much rather say the prayer, lead the music, and bring treats - which is what I've now been asked to do. :o)

My brother, Coulter, is flying here tomorrow from OK and will get to stay until next saturday morning. We are so excited!!! We have a whole week of games and fun planned: Settlers of Catan, the wii, dr. mario, mario kart, going bowling, etc. It will be SO fun! :o)

Maggie!

We went and picked up little Maggie this afternoon. She is 8 weeks old and a shih-tzu breed. She is a sweet little puppy and we love her already! Thanks for all of your comments about dogs - we're so pleased with our baby girl! :o)

Pekingese

I had my voice lessons today - I found a teacher about an hour away and she is fabulous! I really feel like she will help me become a better singer. I can already tell a difference in my voice after only 2 lessons. And now I get to compete in NATS in april! I'm so excited! Now I need to practice everyday - since it's only one month from now! :o)

So this evening we went to a pet store nearby and looked at the different kinds of dogs. When I saw the pekingese, I immediately loved him. Of course, I can't afford to play $1200 for him. (YIKES!) But, we did find a shihtzu on craigslist for $250 and we'll go see her tomorrow. We're excited about finding a new addition for our family. I'm curious to know what kind of dog that you have and why you chose it?

Salami

I had another ultrasound this morning. I have two eggies that are measuring at 11 and 12, respectively. (grow eggies, GROW!) On Monday I'll have another ultrasound and most likely will be doing the HCG shot that night...everything's right on track for this cycle. One good thing about doing infertility treatments is that my cycles aren't as long as they normally are - therefore we can fit more cycles in a year than I would be having...more opportunities to become pregnant! Hooray! Of course, I'm hoping it will happen sooner rather than later. :o)

I went to the commissary to buy groceries. One lady was giving out samples of this:

I've never purchased hard salami before - or any other type of salami. Now that I'm on the SBD (south beach diet), meat is a staple for me...so I bought one...but now I'm wondering what exactly to do with it! Any ideas?

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

What Jill Means

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you. You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries. You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. Hmmm, some is accurate, I think. Today was busy -I started back on SBD diet and that went okay - a bit difficult because I hadn't shopped for SBD food before today. I'm planning to go tomorrow though, so that will help. I color analyzed 3 women today - all winters! It was fun. Then later on this evening, Glittersmama and her family came over to be color analyzed (both winters as well) and to play Dr. Mario and the Wii. It was truly fun - be sure to ask Glittersmama about the "leg teck" on the bowling...

The Power of Self-Mastery

Church was cancelled today due to the blizzard we have had here in OH. We held our own church meeting which Tyler taught on keeping the Sabbath day holy. After Tyler taught us out of the Gospel Principles manual, we have decided to not play video games on Sunday. And since we JUST bought the wii on friday - let me tell you how difficult that was to follow today! Especially with our being snowed-in and everything...but somehow, we survived. :o)

Tomorrow I am restarting back on the diet/exercise program (South beach diet/YMCA). I'm determined to gain self-mastery over my addiction to food. Here is a very helpful talk by Pres James E Faust on self-mastery. I'm also reading a book by Dr. Phil on weight loss, which I think will help me as well. I'm excited to see how my life will change with my determination to accomplish this great task and by allowing God to help me through it. I am so blessed to have the gospel in my life - it leads me forward and gives me hope in the midst of my challenges.

New stuff!

It's a blizzard here in OH - Anna was released early from school, snow everywhere, winter advisory, etc. Sounds like a perfect day to stay home and enjoy ourselves...except that we ventured out to buy a tv PLUS we got lucky and found a wii! So, now we've got a new 42 inch lcd tv AND a wii...it's so exciting! :o) Now we can stay home tomorrow and just enjoy our new STUFF! Thanks for all of your ideas on the tv - we bought ours at hhgregg, Tyler did some nice negotiation on the price! I guess all those years of selling door-to-door come in handy. :o)

Television hunt

So, we're looking to upgrade our t.v. to something bigger and better. Currently we have a modest 27 inch tube tv. It has served us well, however, with Tyler's promotion we are thinking to upgrade it to something 40 inches or larger. We thought of buying a used rear projection tv from craigslist - but realized that by the time we bought one (they range about $600-700 for 47 in and above) that we'd have to buy a light bulb every 2 years and they range in price around $200 EACH, which that would almost equal $900 - and at that price we could buy a new one. So, we're thinking of upgrading to a NEW tv. I don't know anything about the modern tvs, therefore, I need YOUR input. Tell me about your tv:

-where you bought it

-what features it has that made you want it

-what brand did you choose

-if it's LCD, plasma, flat screened...and explanations on what those actually MEAN would also help...

I look forward to your advice! :o)

Tag Time

I have been tagged by Liberty to share 7 random things about myself. Please note that I will be tagging 7 others to do likewise at the end of the post. Enjoy.

1. I love rainbow makers. I have 2 in my house and would like more so I can have rainbows in every room...

2. There's something about a loud noise, like the vaccuum cleaner or my blow dryer or the garage door opening that makes me want to sing loud, which I do. :o)

3. It bothers me to have more than 10 messages in my email inbox at all times. I have to delete or redistribute the emails to folders before I have peace of mind.

4. In a bowl of cereal - I must have more cereal than milk - usually by 1/3 - 1/2 cup. Strange, I know.

5. I love to tickle and kiss and snuggle my daughter. Her laughter is the most beautiful sound to me.

6. If my home is tidy and neat - then I am a very happy person. However, if it isn't - then I am not.

7. When it is winter-time, I have to bake. It's instinct. If you want freshly baked goods - come in the winter to visit. I can't resist it...and I don't know why.

I now tag Jessica, Cari, Kathey, Melody, Kristina, Misti, & Melisa to blog about 7 random things about YOU! I can't wait to read the results.

Spring, where are you?

I'm ready for springtime. If you know me - I LOVE snow and winter and hot chocolate and extra blankets and winter baking and fireplaces and so on...but - I'm ready for spring now. We had a springy day yesterday and it just wasn't fair to us to follow it up with a rainy, cold day. *sigh*

I went in for my ultrasound and blood draw this morning. Everything is a go for another round of injections - I'll start those tomorrow. I forgot how injections change your menstrual cycle to VERY heavy...so heavy, in fact, that I can't leave my house - I have to be close to a bathroom at all times. I think it should tone down by tomorrow, though...I hope! I'm feeling better about it all today. Now I'm trying to gear up on the diet/exercise front! :o)

Our nintendo 64 system came in today...we've already played it a few times and Anna is asking to play some more. We're contemplating the idea of purchasing a bigger screened television. I don't have to have the latest and greatest technology - I just want something a little bigger than our 27 inch tv that we currently have. I've found some good deals on craigslist that we're looking into. Also, we're thinking of getting a dog for our family...any suggestions on types that are good with kids?

This is a comical clip that is about making love - I'm not gonna lie. I just want you to know ahead of time in case you don't care to watch:

Celebrate my family

If you're just now tuning into the life of Jill, The WARRIOR, then you will know that I am pursuing infertility treatments. It takes a warrior to endure infertility struggles. It's been almost 5 1/2 years that we've been trying for baby #2. Since we moved to OH, I have had the amazing blessing of working with an infertility specialist on-base. We've done clomid, metformin, injections, & IUI. I was hopeful this month - like every other month - but I woke up to my period this morning. :o( So, it looks like I'll be starting back up on the abdominal injections this week...I don't mind them so much - it's the HCG shot in the buttocks the day before the IUI that really hurts. My sweet husband came home to spend some time with me during his lunch break - he gave me a blessing that really comforted me and gave me hope. I couldn't ask for a more supportive husband than Tyler. He is constant in his affection, encouragement, and love for me. I wouldn't be able to endure this trial without a strong man at my side. I love you, Honey!

I'm grateful for friends. When Sarah heard about my period coming today - she came and picked me up and took me shopping. She's very perceptive and attentive to me and I'm very grateful for such a fabulous VT companion and friend. Then out of the blue I received a nice e-card from my friend, Sherry, which really lifted my spirits. And then, my friend Glittersmama, and her family went out to dinner with us at Chili's, then they took us out for ice cream at Graeter's, and then back to her house for some nintendo fun. I'm so grateful for the friends that Heavenly Father blesses me with wherever I am living.

I decided that even though this is another cycle that didn't bring us another baby - I choose to celebrate the family that I do have. I have a beautiful, amazing daughter who loves me and prays for me in every prayer she says. I cannot imagine my life without my daughter or my husband: I love them more than I can express with words.

It's not easy having this much fun

This weekend has been fun. Yesterday we went to Anna's ballet lessons - only to discover that they told us the WRONG TIME so Anna was only able to dance for 2 minutes...which really irked my husband since 2 people told him it started at 10:30am...he was NOT happy...so we went to Sam's club and bought some stuff - which made us feel better...then we went over to Kathey's to spend some time and for Anna to play with Kirsten. THEN we went home to unload our stuff, followed by some serious nintendo-playin' action at Glittersmama's place. Then we went to wal-mart, because I guess we didn't spend enough money at Sam's club...finally coming home - I baked a cake and we watched some Seinfeld episodes before bed.

I picked up Maria & her 3 lovely daughters for church. Choir practice went well - my friend from college, Amanda, came to choir practice and it was nice seeing her & hearing her sing as well. She has a lovely voice. We're working on The Lord's Prayer right now - it's one of my favorites. After church I made the best crescent rolls I've EVER made - they were perfect. :o) We took a nap and then went over to Kacey and Amy's for a scrumptious dinner and games. It's not easy having this much fun in 2 days - because I have nothing planned for this whole week...whatever will I do to fill the time before the next fun weekend?