Thursday, March 09, 2017

Shall we dance?

In the past few months, I have had both Calvin and Silas evaluated for speech services. Both have paperwork stating that they qualify for speech. I have advocated that Calvin receive speech services in his school, but the school said that any speech struggles he is having does not affect his social or educational needs at this time. So I am needing to pursue speech services outside of school.

Next week, I am meeting with Silas' IEP team to discuss the need for speech services for him. Silas' speech needs are greater than Calvin. I am hopeful that the school will see that from his report and after testing him for that.

Tyler has been in China this past week. Whereas it has been challenging being a single mama for a week, it doesn't compare to the 6 month deployment last year. However, Iryna has been diregulated every day that he has been gone. Combine that with a head cold that I currently have, I have been much less patient and understanding with Iryna than I need to be. We are trying to work together to help her regulate herself. Some friends have suggested biofeedback and neurofeedback - which both may be the same thing? I will look into it for Iryna. I know she needs something to help her, but I'm not sure what. I am thankful that our relationship has grown into the one we have today. We are both dedicated to each other and we both love each other very much. What a blessing, because otherwise her behaviors would much more challenging for me to tackle on a daily basis.

Last month, Anna mentioned that there would be a youth Valentine's Dance. I remember that I tried to not show much excitement in her interest to attend said dance. We went to Ross and found something pink for her to wear. She asked me to help her with her makeup and hair - which was so fun to do, although I was really sick with a cold at the time.

Anna said she wasn't intending to dance, so we talked with her about how to politely turn down someone who might ask her to dance. Tyler went along as a chaperone, to be there if Anna started getting nervous or if she wanted to go home early. As soon as Anna entered the gym, she was overwhelmed by the 100+ kids there. Thankfully, her friends from church ran across the room and pulled her away. Her friends knew that it was her very first dance and they had found a table with a chair in the corner, just for her, because they knew that she would want to observe from the sidelines. I am so thankful that she has such understanding friends!

Partway through the dance, Anna noticed a boy. She said that he was very polite and kind to everyone. When someone spilled some water on a table, he quickly helped to clean it up. Anna expressed her interest in him to one of her friends, Marissa, who then went over to tell said boy that Anna would like to meet him. This boy came over and asked Anna to dance - to a fast song - and she said yes! A youth leader went out to the hallway to tell Tyler - so he could come see for himself!

Sure enough, Anna was ON THE DANCE FLOOR, with a BOY, and smiling! After the fast song was over, the girls were instructed to toss one of their shoes into a pile and the boys were told to pick up a shoe, locate that girl, and dance with them. The boy that Anna had been dancing with, K, dove into the pile to find Anna's shoe! They ended up dancing for a few more songs and having a nice time together.

It's amazing to me that Anna wanted to attend the dance, went to the dance, met a boy at the dance, and is now counting down the days until the next dance. What a huge turnaround for my girl with social anxiety! I am really happy for her.

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